Six Things Women Firsts Notice About Men

http://inthenews.springhillgroupcounselling.com/2013/04/22/six-things-women-firsts-notice-about-men/


According to Dr Gordon Patzer, author ofLooks: Why They Matter More Than You Ever Imagined, and one of the world’s leading authorities on physical attractiveness, a lot of what women notice in the first few minutes is appearance-based. “A substantial portion of the six features of a man are apparent, in terms of height, weight and overall physical attractiveness,” he says. And when appearances don’t make the cut, the door slams shut on further interactions. Here’s a list of things to keep that door open.

Physical stature: Don’t be a hypocrite and admit it, this matter, after all everything starts with attraction then the getting-to-know part after.  And again yep, you knew this already, we all do: size really do matters.  Height and weight are right on top of the list of things women notice. “Too much or too little of either immediately classifies the man as unattractive to women, and closes the door before less physically obviously features (such as confidence) can be determined,” says Dr Patzer. Take heart though, the acceptable range is influenced by the woman’s own height and weight.

Appearances and attractiveness: All right, we all agree in some point that beauty is skin deep, but it’s going to get women to discover what lies beneath.  As mentioned earlier, everything starts with attraction then the getting-to-know part after.  Agreed, attractiveness does include what you were born with, thanks to your mom and dad huh, but your genes alone can’t scuttle your chances.  It is very important that you know what to do with your hair, clothes, grooming and basic hygiene, basically how you present and carry yourself.  Women surely are not going to work hard to learn more about you if you can’t even make the effort.

Smile: put a smile in those lips, smile can make anyone look good!  After the  women are finished evaluating your overall build, women will look at your smile. “The ability to smile, particularly within the first few minutes of meeting, sends a welcoming, non-hostile signal to women,” says Dr Patzer. There is one proviso though  and you must take a good consideration of this one because this can make or break it, the smile must show off sensibly good-looking teeth or at least presentable and hygienic teeth. So what are you still waiting for, go and fix an appointment with the dentist!

Humor: One more rationale to show off those pearly white teeth! Women want men who have the ability to laugh and even better have the talent to make the woman laugh. That instantaneously gets you plus points!

Confidence: but never be overdo it.  Women find confident men attractive. According to Dr Sameer Malhotra, head of psychiatry and psychotherapy department at Fortis Hospital in New Delhi, within the first few minutes of meeting, women will not only suss out your level of confidence, they will also interpret the vibes you give out and how you think. “Women notice how clear or decisive you are and whether you approach things positively.” Just remember, like stated above, do not overdo it; cockiness and arrogance are not the same as confidence!

Conversation: Men have given the impression to womankind the characteristic of being strong and silent. Consequently women aren’t expecting you to have mad talking skills.  But instead, all you’ve got to do hold her attention. “We know (scientifically) that the more or longer that a woman gets to know a man, the more physically attractive he becomes in her mind,” says Dr Patzer. Forget the one-liners because women are looking for someone to keep up the conversation.

But the most advice is just be yourself, it is always great to be loved for who you are.

Falling In Love Addiction

http://springhillgroupcounselling.com/2013/04/19/falling-in-love-addiction/


Who among us isn’t snowed under that feeling when someone is fluttering us and at the same time confusing us, that total fascination with the object of our desire, that faith that this time we’ve found the one we are looking for all along.  Maybe the most wonderful feeling in the world is the feeling of in love. We are overwhelmed and drown in confusion.  Then it will occur to us with the gradual realization that yet again, it was just another fairy tale without a happy ending.

The first 50%, which is sexual attraction, is the natures desire to procreate so we have that overwhelming urge to get it together, meaning the biological drive to have sex.  Consequently, great sex which is very much pleasurable and rewarding in more ways is one reason why seeks opportunity to be together.  This is according to some skeptics and the other 50% is projection.
The second half is a bit harder to explain, first, what is projection?  Projection is what we wanted our partner will be.  It is the dream or our fantasy of an ideal partner, how they treat or act towards us.  Someone only has to be apparent for a little sense of some of the distinctiveness but at the same time we should be able to feel those sexual tingles of attraction and the rest we will fill in our imaginations.  And because we are overwhelmed with happiness we will disregard any erudition that will resist to the possible sight.

If you are addicted in falling in love maybe you need to slow down and re-think, process the things first. What you know now may not be enough; it will take time to know someone.  Meaning, if we stop, slow down, and pay attention we might pick some things along the way that may tell us that he/she may or may not be the ideal person.  But remember there is no such thing as perfect; all of us have faults and flaws but as well as good qualities.  We must keep in mind that we have to remain full guarded of whatever may come and we owe it to our self and to the other person to get to know each other in the delightful process of falling in love.
Our past experiences can affect our projections of what is ideal for us that may prompt us to have particular qualities onto sequence of potential partners. We are often depending our present wants to those we didn’t achieve from a failed relationship that lead to us finding a potential partner that will make up we think we deserved and never got enough of. All of us basically want the same thing, attention, acceptance, approval, to name a few.  If time comes someone pays attention to us, we immediately feel that this maybe it.

For a deep relationship to yourself first and have the sense of self-awareness, this is the best “cure” for the serial falling-in-love-followed-by-disappointment trap.  Every one of us has a unique biography and by exploring this in detail we can often find out what particular projections we are likely to be making and why.

Aside from this will permit us to begin agreeing to conditions of premature relationship that might be driving us, this is also owning every positive projection one is putting on to the other partner.  Who wouldn’t want a faithful partner, all of us values fidelity. If you are intact with the belief that they are endlessly fascinated in everything that interests you, that means you value and seek companionship and shared ideals.  If you want to start to seek these characteristics openly, you must own the said desires.  Therefore, you may start learning how to evaluate all the information that you have about the way they behave and most importantly to have the self-esteem to avoid people who don’t genuinely offer these.

And if you are finding these ways hard to face alone you can always seek help trough a counselor.  They are always willing to work with you without being judged. They will help you identify your own personal drivers, to help you build your self-esteem and identify and take back your projections. Counseling is a relationship itself. Find a counselor that is focus on developing healthy ways to live the life that brings out the best in you. Counseling leads to self-love and will make us prepared to find real love with others.

Cognitive Behavioural Therapy: Reduces Depression

http://inthenews.springhillgroupcounselling.com/2013/04/03/cognitive-behavioural-therapy-reduces-depression/

A study in the Lancet says cognitive behavioural therapy (CBT) can reduce symptoms of depression in people who fail to respond to drug treatment.

CBT is a kind of psychotherapy that was instituted to help nearly half of the 234 patients who underwent it added with normal care from their GP.

People with depression, almost sums up to two-thirds, do not respond to anti-depressants.

Charity Mind said patients should have access to a range of treatments.

CBT is a type of talking psychotherapy to facilitate people with depression to amend the way they think to improve correct how they feel and change their behaviour.

The study followed 469 patients with treatment-resistant depression picked from GP practices in Bristol, Exeter and Glasgow over 12 months.

Two groups were studied which one group of patients continued with their usual care from their GP that would mean anti-depressant medication included while the other group was also treated with CBT

Researchers got to know that 46% of those who had received CBT showed at least a 50% reduction in their symptoms after six months.

This is all with the comparison to 22% undergoing the same reduction in the other group.

The study established CBT was useful in dropping symptoms and improving patients’ worth of life.  The developments had been preserved for 12 months, it added.

Other options

Dr Nicola Wiles, from the Centre for Mental Health, Addiction and Suicide Research at the University of Bristol, said: “While the addition of CBT was effective for patients who had not responded to anti-depressants, not everyone who received CBT got better. These patients had severe and chronic depression so it is unlikely that one treatment would be effective for everyone.”

“We need to invest in other research to find alternative treatments for patients whose symptoms have not responded to treatment with anti-depressants.”

The patients who did benefit from cognitive behavioural therapy spent one hour a week with a clinical psychologist learning skills to help change the way they think.

Chris Williams, professor of psychosocial psychiatry at the University of Glasgow, and part of the research team, said: “The research used a CBT intervention alongside treatment with anti-depressants. It confirms how these approaches – the psychological and physical – can complement each other.

“It was also encouraging because we found the approach worked to good effect across a wide range of people of different ages and living in a variety of settings.”

Paul Farmer, chief executive at the mental health charity Mind, said there was no “one size fits all” treatment for people with mental health problems.

“We welcome this research because it recognises that patients should have the right to a wide range of treatment options based on individual needs,” he said.

“Initiatives such as the Improving Access to Psychological Therapies (IAPT) programme has helped to ensure that more treatment options are available for conditions such as depression, however, we know that there still is a huge difference between what treatment people want and what they actually get.”

In whatever though, it will be better to stay protected and on guard of your own self, there are many fraud prevention and scam watch about the topic that you can check to help you.

Symptoms of Compulsive Eating

http://springhillgroupcounselling.com/2013/04/03/symptoms-of-compulsive-eating/

BED or “binge-eating disorder” or sometimes being referred to as “food addiction”, Compulsive Eating or Overeating is distinguished by an obsessive-compulsive relationship to food.  By the ingestion and longing for foods that are, in themselves, harmful to the individual, this state is not only apparent by irregular food intake in terms of amount.  Even beyond the point of being comfortably full, people enduring from this disorder engage in repeated period of unrestrained eating, or binge eating, at some stage which they may experience that they are already out of control, frequently overriding food in rage,  The binge is more often than not is subsequent by feelings of guilt, shame, and depression.  Sequentially to feel better about themselves, binge eaters will give or submit in to cravings with another binge, which they wish will anesthetized out the bad feelings; thus, the cycle repeats itself.  Always remember though and keep in mind the scam prevention and the scam watch, some may pretend to be a legitimate counselors and may take advantage of you.

Compare to the eating disorders of anorexia nervosa or bulimia, compulsive eating is less well-known and that it is different from the latter.  While binge eaters on the other hand do not attempt to compensate for their bingeing with vomiting, fasting, or laxative use.  People with this disorder also do battle with grazing, at some stage in which they return to eat small amounts of food all through the day.

Here are some signs and symptoms of Compulsive Eating

• Is obsessed with thoughts about food
• “Comfort eats” in order to relieve stress or worry
• Eats much more rapidly than normal (so that they can eat more)
• Eats alone or hides food in order to eat in secret due to shame and embarrassment
• Eats very little in public, but maintains a high body weight
• Feels guilty due to overeating, and/or eats more than intended to when began
• Feels sluggish or lethargic from overeating
• Binge eats or eats uncontrollably even when not physically hungry
• Eats everything on the plate, even when full
• Goes on a food binge after dieting or trying to cut back
• Eats until feeling sick
• Feels anxious while eating, which results in more eating
• Does not like to feel hunger
• Gets depressed or has mood swings
• May be aware that eating patterns are abnormal
• Is preoccupied with body weight
• Over time, has felt the need to eat more and more to get the desired emotional state
• Has experienced withdrawal when cutting down/out certain foods (not including caffeine)
• Experiences rapid weight gain or seemingly sudden obesity
• Has a history of weight fluctuations
• Has difficulty moving around due to weight gain
• Sometimes consumes certain foods so often or in such large quantities that spends time dealing with negative emotions instead of working, spending time with family or friends, or engaging in other important or enjoyed activities
• Has withdrawn from activities because of embarrassment about weight
• Has a history of many unsuccessful diets
• Has low self-esteem and (therefore) feels the need to eat greater and greater amounts
• Sees food as something to be avoided, harmful